I always look forward to writing my Sunday Sparkle posts, because it gives a chance to share my reflections and connect with my readers on a more personal level. But writing them also scares the bejeezus out of me! It’s really when I let my guard down and allow myself to be a more vulnerable. Case in point:
This week, in Nicole’s life…
I’ve been renovating my room over the past month, so I keep having to make so many big and little decisions. What color should the floors be? The walls? What couch design do I want? Is this the best faucet for my sink? Oh my gosh. The list goes on and on. I’m actually enjoying the process, but I was surprised about how much thinking I had to do before I could actually “commit” to my design picks.
A peek at the current state of my room! No floors yet + mocking up the layout of my desk here.
I was getting all worked up and wasting so much energy, because I had to make sure that I was choosing the best options. I was consulting with way too many people about what they thought without making an actual decision. While scouting for furniture finds with my designer, Melissa, she said something that made me stop in my tracks. “The thing is, you know what you want,” she shrugged. “You just need to trust yourself.” Continue reading →
For the longest time, I struggled with self-care. It was a weird cycle—I took care of the people in my life and I hoped (and half-expected) them to take care of me in return. As you can expect, this kind of relationship scenario allowed guilt, resentment, and frustration become big players. Not fun.
It took time, but I was finally able to see the dysfunction going on. Once I did, I started to set healthier boundaries, learned to do things for myself, and forced myself to say no to things I didn’t want to do. Did I feel guilty? Yes. Did I feel alone? Yes. Did it rattle me to my very core? Yes. But I stuck to my guns and did it anyway.
And so I did. It wasn’t easy—especially since changing myself also meant that the people around me had to adjust, too. It was worth it though. I had to start living for myself and stop being the girl who was always seeking reassurance from other people. I began to rebuild my foundation, practiced trusting myself, and began making decisions based on what I really wanted. In a nutshell, I grew up—and it was awesome. ♥